Orchestrating Your Own Disney Ending
[This blog post has been published in July issue of MMR magazine.]
My wife enjoys watching movies with fast action scenes where people inevitably get hurt. As the decibel level in the movie’s soundtrack increases, so does my heart rate.
I on the other hand enjoy tuning into the Disney channel for one simple reason; I know how Disney movies end. While I may cry in the middle, as I did when I first watched the Sound of Music, I knew Disney wouldn’t disappoint me. I knew there would always be a discovery of purpose with a happy resolution.
Here’s my universal equation to maximize happiness. and harmony in our life.
H= Quality of Time.
You’ll notice that money is missing from this equation. Of course, money is important and touches every part of our life. Still, money only matters, when the things you do are worthy of your time. In fact, the value of every transaction includes a measurement of time. “Time is what we want most, but what we use worst.” William Penn.
Einstein was quoted as saying that the distinction between past, present, and future is merely an illusion. How often do we say, “where did the time go?” Time is fleeting. Like a current in a river, you can never dip your foot into the same exact location twice. Time can be your friend or hold you hostage. When you are in the state of flow, time feels like life is timeless. When you love what you are doing, in that moment, time is your friend. On the other hand, if you are stressed, and surrounded by more takers than givers, the quality of your life suffers.
Musicians and music lovers are no strangers to this concept of the impact of time. After all, music is organized sound connected in time. And since art mirrors life, why not orchestrate your life where the theme is happiness. Cut out all the noise by focusing on the quality of your time.
And just like the music orchestrator gets to decide when the score is performed pianissimo, and when it’s scored forte, you too can decide how you want your life timeline to be performed.
It's not unusual for a composer to have a clear idea of the instrumental sounds before the actual notes are written. So no need to get into a state of paralysis through over-analysis. Simply think about how you want your life’s soundtrack to sound. What is it that you value? Whatever the answer is, value inexorably lives in the present moment of time. Not in the past. Not in the future. The moment of time that’s happening right now.
If you believe the quality of your time could use a tune-up, start exploring the quality of your relationships. For example, are there some people in your life that leave you with a feeling of heaviness, resistance, or a reluctance to continue the conversation? Is it your repair guy? Is it one of your music teachers? Are there some people in your life that fully drain your peace and harmony? How do you know? The time quality is agonizing. Maybe it’s time to make the necessary changes.
Shortly before my dad died, I asked him if he had any regrets. He thought for a moment and then looked me straight in the eyes as if my question hit him at his core. He said ‘Jaimie, my one regret was that I didn’t spend more time with my children. I could have made changes, but I didn’t, and for that I’m sorry.’ I believe my dad did pass away with a bit of regret. It’s almost like he had an unwritten commitment and agreement he made which he wasn’t able to keep. That’s why it’s so important not to get wrapped up in a picture of what others expect of you. Perhaps my dad felt undue financial pressure to keep up with others. Perhaps it was his disappointment that he couldn’t finish college and pursue a career in journalism that he often spoke about. Everyone has a unique sound track to follow. We know from our own core when our life is aligned with our higher self.
Dr. Jacob Needelman, the author of Money and the Meaning of Life writes:
The great sociologist Max Weber used the phrase “worldly asceticism” to characterize the devotedness and self-denial with which modern people, especially Americans, perused the making of money. To what extent have we made worldly success the justification for our lives, and is belief in this equation beginning to crumble in our culture, even as the role of money increases in its power and influence over our lives?
You get to decide when to increase your score to high dB to amplify the action scenes and when to decrease dB to support the peace and harmony scenes. Now start orchestrating your life for the Disney ending.
Jaimie Blackman — a former music educator & retailer— is co-founder of BH Wealth Management. The organization offers 401(k), insurance, and succession planning services. Download your complimentary copy of End Your War With Money at .bhwealth.com/moneycapsules Registered Representative, First Allied Securities, Inc. Member FINRA/SIPC